The Ballad of Charles Whitman
by Kinky Friedman

Alabama didn’t get the invite.

Right-wingnut Jake Lang storms a cat-lovers’ convention thinking it was for furries
Jake Lang is one of the right-wing’s loudest hatemongers. So far as I know, he doesn’t live in Seattle, but a few days ago he ruined my city’s annual Diwali festival by showing up with his fellow wingnuts carrying signs that said, “Deport all dot heads.” And now this, where he’s hoping to infuriate people celebrating their harmless kink, but instead disrupts a cat adoption event.
According to his Wikipedia page, Lang spent four years in prison for his part in storming the capitol on 1/6/2021, before being pardoned by America’s Worst President. Since then, he’s been arrested for illegal and/or obnoxious behavior in Minneapolis, New York City, Washington DC, twice in Texas, and Minneapolis again. He’s Jewish but anti-Semitic, and calls for Islam to be banned, Hindus to be deported, gays and others denied civil rights…
And I ask seriously: Why is this schmuck allowed to walk around free?

What’s missing from every story about last Tuesday’s anti-Trump rout
The biggest story from Tuesday’s Trump rebuke is what didn’t happen
Trump casts doubt on midterm election results

Remember when people used to say “Nobody is above the law”? Anyone saying that in 2026 is looney tunes.
Whistleblowers tell Democrats documents linked to Trump’s construction projects are being destroyed
Marco Rubio reportedly spent over $1.2m of taxpayer money traveling to son’s football games
‘Gotta be kidding me’: Pentagon official reveals Hegseth’s criteria for senior promotions
Alina Habba Mildon loses $50 million contract that enraged Trump
Commerce Dept. chip inquiry was halted after Nvidia complained
US cleared Nvidia chips to Chinese firms with empty offices and troubling ties

Other than money, there’s nothing Trump & the Republicans like more than cruelty.
Trump-appointed Judge accused of making racist remarks, skipping court is no-show at her own hearing
Trump regime moves to further limit SNAP eligibility, affecting millions
Trump administration proposes stricter work search rules to qualify for unemployment benefits

A year after full release was required by law, 99% of the Trump-Epstein files remain hidden from public view. Why is that, do you suppose?
The midterms energized a powerful political constituency: abuse survivors
Injunction permanently silenced one of Russell Brand’s victims

Republicans are fascists, liars, and quislings…
White House warns Democrats against ‘blatant criminality’ in investigation demands
Excerpt: The letter, signed by White House counsel Will Scharf and dated earlier this week, says the administration is “monitoring the abusive and capricious threats that are now proliferating from Democrat legislators who seek to abuse the legislative process to intimidate and to interfere with the lawful functioning of government.” It adds the Supreme Court has held that congressional investigations must further a legitimate legislative task and cannot be used for harassment.
Laura Loomer puts her bullshit on hiatus
Republican repeatedly swears in front of little girl during unhinged victory speech
Ted Cruz tells himself a story
… and Democrats are the party of reaching across the aisle, to work with Republican fascists, liars, and quislings.
House Democrats blame traffic for missing key Hegseth impeachment vote
Traffic, my infected ass. Dems’ House Leader Hakeem Jeffries isn’t serious about wanting Hegseth gone — he didn’t even ‘whip’ Dems to vote one way or the other. Many Democrats have no interest in making waves, and will do whatever it takes to avoid it.

The original Gestapo didn’t wear masks. That’s the only difference.
ICE investigated how dozens of detainees died. The findings are ‘damning’.
ICE prisoners are held in hidden locations until deportation
California boy, 8, abducted by ICE during scheduled immigration appointment
Immigrants are being systematically deported despite court orders
The New York Times headline is “Immigrants are being systematically returned home despite court orders,” but that’s bullshit. Immigrants are being systematically ripped from their homes and jobs and sent to foreign countries that may or may not be where they’re originally from, but their homes are here in America. They’re absolutely not being “returned home.”
Federal agents block hospital’s ER entrance, spark two-hour ambulance diversion
‘No business having a gun’: Some ICE recruits had a record of red flags
“Some.”
ICE officer involved in Maine shooting expressed hatred of immigrants
Well, duh. It is self-evident that a substantial portion of ICE agents are Proud Boys, Oath Keepers, or KKK.

Rich people can afford medicine, but you ain’t rich. That’s why Republicans oppose health care for you.
RFK Jr. is seeking to spend taxpayer dollars on ‘faith-based’ addiction recovery programs
Hospitals brace for Medicaid work rules and deep funding cuts

Science is factual. That’s why Republicans hate science.
Just 2 more years until we’re done with floppy disks, FAA says
This coverage provides much mirth and nostalgia at the concept of floppy discs, but jack squat about the coming technology. Unasked is the question, Is this new and improved system being designed by people who write software as a career and understand the dynamics of flight and navigation, or is it being vibe coded by jackasses?
Top astrophysicist leaves US after Trump policies blockade her work
Excerpt: Trump was sworn into office a few months later, and it seemed to Holley-Bockelmann that crisis response was her new job. The federal government froze active grant payments, which many of her students depended on for living expenses. She wrote to the National Science Foundation for advice, but her emails bounced back. A few of her international students stopped coming into work for fear of immigration enforcement, and Culbreath moved out of state to finish his research remotely. Another early-career researcher had a panic attack, booked an overnight flight and then called Vanderbilt the next morning to say he’d permanently returned home to Santo Domingo.
Scientists sue to block Trump administration changes at Science Foundation

“US President is a gibbering madman” should be the top headline every day, and until it is, the news media is lying to you.
Are AI bots running these Philadelphia and New Jersey news sites?
Excerpt: “That is my name associated with my former publication,” he explained. “That is a bio that looks pretty accurate about myself, but that is not my picture. These two top articles; those are not my work. They are dated as recent as of this year. I haven’t been associated with the company in almost a full seven years.”
Excerpt: On Oct. 30, novelist and New York Times romance columnist Olivia Waite logged onto BlueSky and saw a post by independent journalist Marisa Kabas. She read it, hit repost on a comment, and went about the rest of her day. Later that evening, Waite received an email with a blank subject line. Her editor at the Times, Tina Jordan, wrote that the paper would not be continuing her freelance contract as the New York Times Book Review’s romance columnist.
Macklemore says that nine US arenas turned down his Free Palestine tour
Democrats won an election so it’s time to care about the national debt again
Israel linked to far-right great replacement theory influence campaign

Social media eats people’s brains, and data security doesn’t really exist.
AG Blanche says license plate readers don’t affect Americans’ privacy
Anyone aware of anything regarding Flock cameras knows Blanche is lying. This particular lie makes me suspect that Flocks are fed on a direct wire into the Justice Department.
Total system failure: US government networks will need to be torched and rebuilt
Excerpt: At least one of the 28 (!) dodgy proxy services found installed on numerous White House computers (Infatica) is linked to a Russian company whose founder’s web hosting business was central to cyberattacks against election systems in Arizona and Illinois in 2016.

Capitalism might work if there’s meaningful regulation, but there’s none of that until Elon Musk is in prison.
San Francisco can now create a public bank after measure declares victory
Tesla Cybertruck ends its bumpy run: cracked windows, long delays, and 11 recalls
New York Times Company in advanced talks to acquire and ruin Letterboxd
Thanks to data centers, a 50-year-old factory part is flying off the shelves

Tax rates must be high enough to prevent billionaires.
There is no place in a functional society for Elon Musk
Martha Stewart’s ‘hobo’ shows how Trump emboldened rich people

Malcolm X said, “We want freedom, justice, and equality, by any means necessary.”
Developer ends screensaver deal with Roku because Fox bought it
Statue on National Mall mocks Trump for Vietnam draft deferment
Oh, no: ICE vehicles vandalized

Justice is rare and temporary, because the bad guys always appeal to a higher court.
Right-wing efforts to block gun control are based on Scalia’s Supreme Court ‘misquote’
Attorney General threatens to arrest Democrats over “rhetoric”
Attorney General says he’s also Stephen Miller’s personal lawyer
Supreme Court can’t take up copyright case after four justices with book deals recuse… again
Jeanine Pirro opens criminal probe into Dobbs leak for her next public failure
Somali bodyguard was indicted in a bid to incriminate Ilhan Omar
Justice Dept. mulled naming New York Times as conspirator in Comey leak case
James Comey was a shitty FBI Director, but the prosecution has nothing to do with that. It’s just more Trump vengeance, and it they thought they could get vengeance on the Times, so much the better.
Florida Attorney General subpoenas DSA, claiming ties to Cuba and China

The Department of Stuff That Doesn’t Quite Fit Above or Below
Should American football be banned? Discuss among yourselves.
Hip-Hop High School in New York City
Poll finds more Americans putting out cigarettes on arm to reclaim sense of control

I believe in art and writing and science and stuff, and find it troublesome that all art and writing and science and stuff has been stolen and scraped and can now be artificially created. Fuck AI.
Excerpt: Marketed as playful companions, tutors, and friends—and sometimes as a healthier alternative to screen time—these new stuffed animals, dolls, and robots are essentially chatbots in cuddly packaging.

Climate change is real, it’s well underway, it’s going to get worse, and then it’s going to get worse than that. It’s never going to stop getting worse, so long as capitalism and the quest for money decides everything.
Seabirds are starving to death because warming waters have driven fish deeper
‘The world we know is over’ without urgent climate action, leaders tell Cop31
National security of all countries at risk due to climate crisis, UK foreign secretary warns

American cops are armed and dangerous, barely trained, barely supervised. They can get away with anything, and do.
Colorado police commander arrested for shoplifting spree
Georgia: Entire police force quits after Mayor starts surveilling them and tracking their movement
Former Ohio officer pleads guilty to sexual imposition: ‘Fully ashamed and embarrassed’
You’ll be “fully ashamed” from prison.
Pennsylvania police chief arrested on theft charges

Religious followers believe their god protects and guides them, but god never shows up. Every religion is led only by humans, who often turn out to be charlatans, swindlers, or perverts.
Louisiana priest accused of stealing from church parish
27 priests added to New Orleans Archdiocese’s list of clergy accused of abuse
Former New Jersey deacon sentenced to 25 years for sexually abusing girl
Virginia: Christian Academy soccer coach charged with taking indecent liberties with a minor

Farewell to the recently deceased who made the world a bit better, and good riddance to the fuckers who should’ve died much, much younger.
Tinto Brass
film director, Caligula
Julian Brodsky
asshole co-founder of Comcast
Tony Butala
rock’n’roller, The Lettermen
T. Cullen Davis
rich fucker and probably murderer
Stacy Keach
actor, Fat City
William Nordhaus
carbon tax
Steve Selvin
the Monty Hall problem
Marvin R. Shanken
“His magazine changed how we drink wine.”
Kakule William
actor, Who Killed Captain Alex?

Nothing will meaningfully improve
until billionaires fear for their lives.
11/11/2026
News always and only from reliable sources, and I decide what’s reliable — no right-wing bullshit, no Substack because fuck Nazis, no RawStory, Newsweek, or other clickbait sites, and no Jonathan Chait, Malcolm Gladwell, Glenn Greenwald, Ezra Klein, Nate Silver, Matt Taibbi, Matthew Yglesias, or other famous writers with nothing left to say. Written news is preferred; video links will be rare, and damned near never to videos where the reporter sits, stands, or strolls in front of a camera — that’s show biz, not news.
If you’re blocked from reading anything linked above, simply send an email, and I’ll reply with the article’s complete text, via my vast array of fine ad-blockers and paywall-vaulters. And I mean it — if you ask, I will get you the article.
Logo illustration by Jeff Meyer. Tip ‘o the hat to the Anderson Valley Advertiser, Daily Grail, Pete Ashton’s Notes & Links, StreetsBlogUSA, TechDirt, Voenix Rising, What Not’s, Jamie Zawinski, and anywhere else I’ve stolen links, illustrations, or inspiration. Special thanks to Linden Arden, Becky Jo, Joey Jo Jo & John the Basket emeritus, the aforementioned Mr Meyer, Dave S, Name Withheld, and always extra special thanks to my lovely late Stephanie, who gave me 21 years and proved that the world isn’t always shitty.
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