our 70th weekly open mike

Let’s see what happens when your host (me) has nothing to say. Step right up, speak your mind, tell a story, sing a song, whatever.

3/7/2026

Anything goes

itsdougholland.com 
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Judge orders Alabama Christian teacher held without bond on sex charges

Excerpt: Alabama state agents put 54-year-old Rodger Loftin behind bars on Tuesday, with charging documents accusing him of soliciting sex from children and asking 14 and 15-year-old boys for photos of their private parts.

Court records confirmed that Loftin taught at Abbeville Christian Academy.

California: Bethel places ministry leader on paid leave after allegations of sexual assault

Excerpt: During a Sunday morning service, Bethel lead pastor Dan Farrelly addressed statements posted Feb. 13 and 15 responding to videos released earlier that month by the “Wake Up and Win Podcast,” in which two women alleged prophetic overseer Ben Armstrong groomed them, including one who claims she was sexually assaulted under his care for several years before 2009, and said the accounts do not match facts presented to leadership in 2009.

California: Former Mormon bishop ordered to register as sex offender, DA’s office said

Excerpt: On Friday, Feb. 20, former Mormon Bishop Alan Roman Andrus was ordered to register as a sex offender, according to an El Dorado County District Attorney’s office Facebook post.

Connecticut: Hamden Pastor Lisa Levy facing many animal cruelty charges

Excerpt: A Connecticut pastor is accused of abusing multiple rescue animals she adopted, leaving them with severe chemical burns, broken bones, skin lesions, and neurological issues — and some died, authorities said. She blames someone else for the alleged abuse.

Indiana youth minister sentenced to nine years in federal prison for child exploitation

Excerpt: At the time of the investigation, Lockman was employed as a youth minister at a church in Jasper, Indiana. Authorities said his role granted him supervision over young boys, whom he frequently took on one-on-one outings to local restaurants.

Federal agents searched Lockman’s church-issued computer and cell phone, uncovering multiple videos depicting minors under the age of 12.

“This sick individual placed himself in daily proximity to children and exploited his position as a minister to cultivate special relationships with vulnerable boys,” said Tom Wheeler, U.S. Attorney for the Southern District of Indiana.

New York: Federal judge approves plan for Syracuse Catholic church to pay millions in sex abuse settlements while avoiding bankruptcy

The church thanks you for your tithes and offerings, which make all this possible.

North Carolina: Christian teacher arrested on 10 counts of child sex exploitation, court records show

Excerpt: A now former sixth-grade teacher at Vandalia Christian School, a private Christian school in Guilford County, was arrested Friday on 10 counts of second-degree sexual exploitation of minors, according to court records and school officials.

North Carolina: Former Wake County schools teacher and youth pastor charged with child sex crimes

Excerpt: A former Wake County Public Schools teacher and youth pastor is facing charges after he was accused of sex crimes against children, according to the North Carolina State Bureau of Investigation.

Court documents showed that Mikah Brondyke sent explicit videos to a Holly Springs police officer acting undercover as a 14-year-old girl.

Ohio: Judge hands maximum sentence for sexual abuse to former Columbus pastor

Excerpt: A former Columbus pastor will spend 15 years in prison after admitting to sexually assaulting two teenagers in Pickaway County.

Ohio: Former pastor gets prison term for child abduction

Excerpt: Santos, pastor of Canton Seventh-Day Adventist Church, was arrested in February 2025 and charged with kidnapping, two counts of gross sexual imposition, and endangering children.

In January, Santos entered a guilty plea to the amended charge of abduction.

Pennsylvania: Church youth leader found guilty of raping teen girl who he took to Mexico

Excerpt: The victim — who is now 24-years-old — told the courtroom she was 8-years-old when she first met Esterly and his family while attending church and became best friends with his stepdaughter. Esterly was a youth leader and elder at the church at the time. The victim said Esterly also coached her soccer team.

The victim said she became so close to Esterly’s family that she called his wife “mom” and eventually spent almost every weekend at their home in Lowhill Township, Pennsylvania. She also said she vacationed with them in New York state and Ocean City, Maryland.

The victim said Esterly first sexually assaulted her in August 2015 when she was 13-years-old after he gave her alcohol during a family birthday party.

Rhode Island priests abused hundreds of children over decades, report finds

Excerpt: A blistering report issued Wednesday describes decades of child sexual abuse in Rhode Island’s Catholic churches, documenting accusations against dozens of priests involving hundreds of victims.

The report from Peter F. Neronha, the state’s attorney general, also lays out repeated failures by the Diocese of Providence to remove priests or bring in law enforcement in response to accusations. Instead, investigators working for Mr. Neronha found, the diocese chose to handle reports of abuse internally, primarily by moving offending priests to new parishes.

The diocese transferred at least 30 accused priests to new jobs at least five times each, Mr. Neronha said in a news conference on Wednesday.

Tennessee: Sex offender volunteered at Greater Things Christian School for years, with no background check

Excerpt: “We are cooperating fully with law enforcement at this time, and have been advised to refrain from making any public comments concerning this matter that might interfere with this investigation. We can tell you that our school remains committed, as its first priority, to ensuring the safety, privacy and well-being of all of our students. We have also purchased Raptor technology to run thorough background checks for all campus parents, visitors, volunteers, and vendors who have access to school property.”

Texas: Pastor resigns after keeping his son’s sex-offender status secret

Excerpt: The church and its school, Heritage Christian Academy, recently terminated Caleb Crawford’s contract as a maintenance worker after parents discovered his status as a lifetime registered sex offender. He was also one of the music leaders at the church.

Parents told police they saw Crawford working as a janitor and observed him installing security cameras at the school. They also said their children were able to identify Caleb Crawford by name and knew the car he drove.

Crawford’s arrest affidavit also states parents told police that several staff members and teachers at the school knew of Caleb’s status, but were told not to tell parents.

Texas: Religious advisor arrested and charged with sexual and indecent assault

Excerpt: Local religious advisor George Giorgetti was arrested and charged with sexual assault and indecent assault in December, according to arrest records obtained by KFOX14/CBS4.

Giorgetti was arrested on Dec. 17 for one count of sexual assault and released the same day. He was then arrested on Dec. 24 on an indecent assault charge and released the same day.

Seattle Archdiocese must hand over sex abuse records, Washington court rules

Excerpt: A spokesperson for the Seattle Archdiocese said via text Monday night: “Our legal team is reviewing the ruling and we are determining next steps.” It’s unclear if the church will appeal to the state Supreme Court.

In a statement on Monday’s decision, now-Gov. Ferguson called for the church to “do the right thing and engage in a public accounting of how the church handles allegations of child sex abuse.”

Wisconsin: Father in father-son pair of former church pastors convicted of child sexual assault was sentenced to eight months in jail

Excerpt: Scott Huse, 67, pleaded no contest Monday to one count of third-degree sexual assault. Another 11 counts were dismissed. Huse was placed on the sex offender registry for 15 years, court records show.

Previously, his son, Travis Huse, was convicted of 12 counts and sentenced to 25 years in prison.
Me again: It’s the family business!

every movie ever made, in alphabetical order
(we’re in the K’s, with anti-alphabetical cheats)

Keep an Eye Out (2018)
Keep Talking, Baby (1961)
Keep Watching the Skies (1975)
Keep Your Hair Clean (1931)
Kelly’s Heroes (1970)
Ken Park (2002)
The People’s War (1970)

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Keep an Eye Out (2018)
a/k/a At the Station

Keep an Eye Out begins with a symphony in the woods conducted by a man in his underwear, and I won’t tell you how it ends but it’s a grand time getting there.

Louis has discovered a dead body outside his apartment building, so like a good citizen he calls the cops — which makes him the prime suspect. At the police station, an easily-distracted cop interrogates him, and interrupts to say, “This is so pedestrian, it’s just a totally boring chain of events,” as he prods Louis to say something more interesting and incriminating.

Written and directed by Quentin Dupieux (who made Rubber, the horror movie about a spare tire), this is a wackadoodle and wildly inventive low-key French comedy that’s feature-length, but flies so quickly it feels like a short.

All the way, it plays with the conventions of noir and cop movies, the cinematic structure of flashbacks, and the famous fourth wall. And characters keep saying “That’s why,” for no reason other than it’s funny. That’s why.

Verdict: Big fun, big wow, BIG YES.

Streaming free with commercials, at Tubi.

♦ ♦ ♦

Keep Talking, Baby (1961)

Jackson, a dashingly handsome ventriloquist lacking a first name, has been falsely convicted of murder, but escapes, and now like OJ Simpson, he’s determined to find the real killer.

Parts of this reminded me of TV’s The Fugitive, which came a few years later and might’ve been at least partly inspired by Keep Talking, Baby. Same as David Janssen’s Doc Kimball, Jackson smirks more than smiles, and inexplicably attracts pretty ladies who help him.

Unlike the TV show, he speaks French, it’s all played for gentle laughs, and the story wraps in an hour and a half instead of four years. Also, Jackson (harmlessly) kidnaps a little girl, steals a car, and parks it illegally, all of which would seem to call unwanted attention to a man wanted by the law.

Not that I’m complaining, about this fluffy, nicely-baked movie meringue.

Verdict: YES.

♦ ♦ ♦

Keep Watching the Skies (1975)

Roy Spence makes homemade movies, usually in the sci-fi genre because he loves that stuff. I’ve seen a few of his flicks, and they’re fun.

This one’s probably fun too, but it’s been ‘preserved’ by the Irish Film Institute, and vandalized with their logo superimposed on every moment. I couldn’t get past their ugly smudge in the corner to judge the film on its merits, and the longer I tried watching, the more I hated the potato-heads who run the Irish Film Institute.

If someday, someone other than me publishes something I’ve written, and emblazons it with their corporate logo on the corner of every page, please burn the place down. I would rather my words simply fade away.

Verdict: MAYBE.

Streaming free at Irish Film Institute.

♦ ♦ ♦

Keep Your Hair Clean (1931)

From Encyclopedia Britannica Films, this is a six-minute primer on washing your hair. Running water was new in the 1930s, so perhaps regular shampoos were a new concept?

Verdict: YES.

Streaming free at Internet Archive.

♦ ♦ ♦

Kelly’s Heroes (1970)

I’d thought this was a war movie, my least favorite genre, and it is. It takes place during World War II, with all the required explosions and corpses and brainless violence. It’s also a heist flick, though, after Kelly (Clint Eastwood) interrogates a captured German officer who tells him about a ginormous stash of gold.

Eastwood is a big plus, and Don Rickles and Donald Sutherland are slight pluses, but Telly Savales is so obnoxious, screaming every line for the first half hour or so, the movie never had a chance. The cacophony of gunfights put me to sleep and then woke me, and I clicked it off when another gunfight woke me with a headache.

Someone who enjoys war or war movies might enjoy this, but that’s not me.

Verdict: NO.

Streaming free at Internet Archive.

♦ ♦ ♦

Ken Park (2002)

Skateboarders and insufferable punk teens think they have it rough in Visalia CA, and for reasons unexplained we’re supposed to care? This flick is famous for its sex scenes, but they’re too icky to be enjoyable, and there’s nothing else to see. One of the kids suicides in the movie’s early moments, and by the end I wanted it to be unanimous.

Verdict: BIG NO.

Streaming free at Internet Archive.

♦ ♦ ♦

The People’s War (1970)

From an anarchist collective called Newsreel, and directed by Robert Kramer, this 40-minute documentary is a hell of a film, simply for existing.

Kramer & crew went to Vietnam in 1969 to make it, and it’s opposed to that war so the film was mostly suppressed. But here it is, and you’re on the ground and among the Vietnamese people as America makes war on them.

Breathtaking, lifetaking footage shows the ruins and the people, as off-screen voices handle the translation. The American attackers come off as the bad guys, which is absolutely accurate, but when the countryside isn’t being obliterated it looks lovely.

The Vietnamese folk singing is, uh, sorry but, unpleasant to my non-Vietnamese ears. Everything else about the flick kicks ass.

Well, they won that time, but the bigger fight continues.

Verdict: YES.

3/6/2026

Logo illustration by Jeff Meyer.
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If you can’t find a movie I’ve reviewed, or if you have recommendations, please drop me a note.
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No talking once the lights dim, and only real butter on the popcorn, not that fake yellow stuff.