A Kiss Before Dying (1955)

Robert Wagner, young and kinda sexy, plays a college student whose girlfriend is pregnant. This would upturn his plans, but not to worry, he finds an unorthodox solution. He’ll just kill his girlfriend.

The film’s pacing is exquisite — the plot never races too fast to follow, and never too slow to hold your interest. As a cop/teacher, Jeffrey Hunter is mildly laughable, wearing ‘smart guy’ glasses and puffing a pipe in every scene he’s in, but it’s exactly kooky enough to add a touch of levity to an otherwise humorless but very good flick.

Virginia Leith, Joanne Woodward, and Mary Astor are featured. From a novel by Ira Levin (Rosemary’s Baby, The Stepford Wives). Music by Lionel Newman (Judd for the Defense), orchestrated by Nelson Riddle (TV’s Batman). Directed by Gerd Oswald (10 Bonanzas, 2 Star Treks).

Verdict: YES.

♦ ♦ ♦

Kiss Kiss Fingerbang (2015)

This is an 11-minute short about a nameless veterinarian and his equally nameless spring-loaded girlfriend, who’ll do anything if you fingerbang her right. This is cute at first, but soon grows distasteful. It leads to one damned funny joke, but the rest of it is a joke I didn’t get.

Buck Henry has cameos at the start and middle.

Original score, songs, and a plug for Phil Beaudreau. “Did you know that he introduced Michael McDonald to Kenny Loggins?”

Verdict: MAYBE.

♦ ♦ ♦

Kiss Me Deadly (1955)

Starts dark, certainly by 1950s standards — Mickey Spillane’s Mike Hammer is driving a snazzy sportscar across the American southwest, when he’s flagged down by a pretty hitchhiker wearing only a bathrobe. She’s escaped from an asylum, but doesn’t have much chance to tell her story before unidentified baddies interrupt their drive, kill the dame, and leave Hammer to sledge out the who’s and why’s.

As the sleazy private eye, Ralph Meeker’s exterior is a little too civilized, but inside he’s a thug, cruel for the fun of it and shivery cold, like Spillane wrote him. He’s looking for “the great what’s it,” which isn’t what you or Hammer expect, unless you’ve seen the movie before.

Beginning to end, this is riveting, thrilling, off kilter then on, and violent, heady, horrific. It had me on the edge of my recliner, though I’ve seen the movie half a dozen times before.

At fancy venues, including Berkeley’s Pacific Film Archive and the marvelous Stanford in Palo Alto, I remember thinking the end was corny, unreal, weak, disappointing, but tonight I’ve decided younger me was full of crap. Maybe you have to be old to really appreciate it, but here’s a noir classic that goes beyond noir. Damned near perfect, all the way.

With Maxine Cooper, Paul Stewart, Wesley Addy, Jack Elam, Strother Martin, and introducing Cloris Leachman. Tremendous cinematography by Ernest Laszlo (Inherit the Wind, It’s a Mad Mad Mad Mad World, Judgment at Nuremberg). Music by Frank Devol (The Brady Bunch, Family Affair, My Three Sons). Written by A I Bezzerides (On Dangerous Ground, They Drive by Night, Thieves’ Highway), based of course on Spillane’s novel. Directed and produced by Robert Aldrich (The Dirty Dozen, The Flight of the Phoenix, Hush…Hush, Sweet Charlotte).

And it ends mighty dark, certainly by 1950s standards.

Verdict: BIG YES.

♦ ♦ ♦

Kiss Me Kate (1953)

Howard Keel is going to be the lead in a new singin’ and dancin’ Broadway show, and he wants his ex-wife Kathryn Grayson to co-star. This could possibly lead to problems, but they’ll be singin’ and dancin’ problems.

Keel is off-putting, at least for me. I saw him in Kismet a few weeks ago, and he sank that flick, same as he sinks this one, with too much thundering bravado.

Features Ann Miller, Bobby Van, James Whitmore, Keenan Wynn, and Bob Fosse. Music and lyrics by Cole Porter.

Verdict: MAYBE.

♦ ♦ ♦

The Chase (1946)

I have seen this before, and didn’t care for it, but a nudge from my pal Claude made me rewatch and reconsider.

Chuck Scott (Robert Cummings) plays a neurodamaged WW2 veteran, low on luck, funds, and smarts, who takes work as chauffeur for a debonair Miami mobster. His boss (Steve Cochran) is a sadist who keeps his wife (Michèle Morgan) a virtual prisoner, but she falls for Chuck the chauffeur and they decide to run off to Cuba together. It’s not an easy getaway, though.

The plot folds back over itself almost like time travel, and at one point it’s revealed that the previous 20 minutes didn’t actually happen. It’s not sci-fi, though, it’s only Chuck’s war-mangled mind, which can’t tell whether he’s really in a noir movie, or only dreaming of noir.

The actor playing the skeptical detective is terrific, as is Peter Lorre as the bad guy’s head henchman, who dismisses Chuck as a “silly law-abiding jerk.” Cummings is quite bad in the lead, though. Hard to believe there’s any inner conflict inside that bland pretty-boy head.

First time watching this, I fell asleep before the titular chase, and it’s thrilling — with no cars! A piano-heavy, almost operatic score sounds a little bipolar, fitting the movie’s theme of mental uncertainty. And there’s a big twist toward the end, which a week later I’ve forgotten, so I might watch this a third time.

In a marvelous moment (is it real, or is it in Chuck’s mind?), a stranger saves Chuck from the cops, and he says, “You never saw me before, but you helped me. Why?”

“Cops. I hate cops.”

OK, I missed the boat first time I saw The Chase. And speaking of the boat, there’s a frickin’ piano in the budget cabin as the SS Cuba sails to Cuba.

Written by Philip Yordan (Johnny Guitar) and directed by Arthur Ripley (Thunder Road), based on Cornell Woolrich’s novel, The Black Path of Fear.

Verdict: YES.

♦ ♦ ♦

How many languages does Werner Herzog speak?

Lilly Wachowski: ‘If you support Harry Potter, you’re supporting trans genocide’

John Williams, 94, shows up for John Williams tribute

Space: 1999 4K double feature, only in theaters

Logo illustration by Jeff Meyer.
— — —
If you can’t find a movie I’ve reviewed, or if you have recommendations, please drop me a note. And I mean it — if you ask, I will get you the movie.
— — —
No talking once the lights dim, and only real butter on the popcorn, not that fake yellow stuff.