The Breakdown (2019)
Part 1 streaming free at GQ
Part 2 streaming free at YouTube

This is totally rad, as the kids say these days. Professional climber Alex Honnold screens and critiques mountain-climbing scenes from big-time Hollywood movies, including Cliffhanger, The Dark Knight Rises, The Eiger Sanction, two Missions: Impossible, the 2015 Point Break remake, Star Trek V, Wonder Woman, and more.

#340  [archive] OCT. 1, 2024

Honnold is energetic and personable, as he laughs at the movie clips and describes how mountain-climbing actually works.It’s not even a spoiler to tell you that Honnold says the best movie mountain climber ever is Clint Eastwood in The Eiger Sanction. Dude actually did (most of) his own mountain climbing in that movie, and everyone knows that, right?From Gentleman’s Quarterly, this is actually two short films, 14 minutes for part 1, and 32 minutes for part 2.
Verdict: YES.♦ ♦ ♦     Homicidal (1961)
Streaming free at Tubi

Homicidal is an unusual film, mesmerizing and ridiculous, and works best in the context of its time, and its director, William Castle.Castle loved movies, but rarely escaped the bargain bin. He had his biggest success as the maker of low-budget horror movies that usually came with a gimmick to help sell tickets. Mr Sardonicus included a “punishment poll,” wherein the audience voted to determine whether the bad guy lived or died. Macabre had an on-screen timer, counting down to its climax. For The Tingler, Castle had a few seats in every theater wired to deliver an electric shock, ensuring screams in the audience.Homicidal is Castle’s response to Psycho, and feels like a sequel, but it ain’t bad. It has a similar set-up as Psycho, similar characters, but goes in its own direction with a wild twist that seems almost obvious nowadays, but was doubtless shocking in ’61.There’s also a 45-second “fright break,” allowing patrons to leave the theater if they were too frightened to see the end of the film. You could get your money back, if you were willing to follow the yellow trail in the lobby and wait in the “Coward’s Corner,” while other moviegoers gawked at you.
Castle made crazy movies, and I’m a fan — no “Coward’s Corner” for me. I watched this to the end, and had a good time.Verdict: YES.♦ ♦ ♦     Homicide (1991)
Streaming free at Tubi

This is a David Mamet tough guy piece, about police detective Bobby Gold (Joe Mantegna), who’s investigating a small-time candy store killing, though he’d rather be chasing a different, higher-profile case.The candy store killing, though, leads Gold to question his identity — he’s a cop, but he’s also Jewish, as was the candy shop victim, who’d once been involved in running guns for Israel in that country’s early days. So is Gold the cop he’s always thought himself to be, or is he Jewish? In Mamet’s world, he might be both, but you know, not really.The film offers tense, kickass dialogue, never lags, and has a lot going for it. Certainly it has my recommendation, but with some caveats.No cops are such stalwart good guys, dedicated to truth, justice, and the American way, as every cop here and in so many other movies. Very few Jews are of divided loyalties, drawn into or already involved in a conspiracy to protect Israel, as written here. And other than Denzel Washington, what actor could be less Jewish than Joe Mantegna?Unrelated to the early 1990s TV show Homicide.Verdict: YES.♦ ♦ ♦     Hondo (1953)
Free on DVD from your public library  “He may be a mean ornery son of anything you wanna call him, but he ain’t no horse thief, and I’m not going to call him one, to his face or his back.”

John Wayne plays Hondo Lane, an ex-soldier who’s now a horseman carrying a crucial Army dispatch, with word that the Apache are on the warpath.As you’d expect in a Wayne movie, he’s smart and stoic and mighty manly, always and only does whatever’s the right thing, and takes no guff. He’s also shown doing all manner of cowboy work, sharpening an axe and shoeing horses and such. He has a dog that’s supposed to be snarling, tough, independent like Hondo, but it’s obviously a friendly critter with growls edited in.Geraldine Page makes her movie debut as the lonely widow raising a boy alone, and mega-macho character actor Leo Gordon plays the 6-year-old boy… and he’s already kinda tough. Future Gunsmoke star James Arness plays a guy who gets punched by the Duke, but it’s not quite clear what his grudge was.No matter, it’s all good, and comes from a novel by Louis L’Amour.The movie’s Apache warriors are, I assume, based entirely on L’Amour’s imagination, not any understanding of actual natives, but they’re portrayed as no more savage than the white men.The movie is less than an hour and a half long, but there’s an intermission. Gotta sell the popcorn and candy bars.Verdict: YES. ♦ ♦ ♦     Honeydripper (2007)
Streaming free at The Roku Channel

This is a seriously hopping story of 1950s Alabama, on the verge of civil rights and rock’n’roll, but still with a long ways to go.Danny Glover owns a struggling rural nightclub, but he’s past due on the rent and his liquor payments. His financial future hinges on whether he can book the touring Guitar Sam for a one-night gig, and outwit the racist sheriff (as if there’s any other kind, especially in the South).Written and directed by John Sayles, there’s a cast of about twenty characters, and a feeling that no matter the odds, things are going to work out in the end.Sayles is great at stories like this, making so many different people feel like flesh and blood, all with their own stories and motivations, criss-crossing to tell one story. This time it’s about one night in one bar, and it’s one heck of a story. Great music, too.And by golly, things do work out in the end.Verdict: YES.♦ ♦ ♦     The Honky Problem (1991) 
Streaming free at YouTube

This is one of Mike Judge’s earliest surviving works, before Beavis and Butt-Head or Office Space or Idiocracy. It’s a two-minute cartoon that looks like a warm-up for Beavis and Butt-Head, and features Inbred Jed and the Little-Bottom Boys, a country-western band performing at a sparsely-attended concert.It’s funny, and then it’s over. You’ll want more, and fortunately, Judge has given us lots more.Verdict: YES.♦ ♦ ♦     Munich (2005)
Free on DVD from your public library

I love early Steven Spielberg — Duel, Jaws, Close Encounters, etc, but his later, oh-so-serious films have left me unmoved. I yawned through Schindler’s List, and wasn’t expecting much from this, Spielberg’s take on Middle East violence and vengeance. I am pleasantly surprised, and it greatly exceeds my expectations.First, let’s talk about the Middle East: It’s a cesspool of hate, with everybody hating everybody who worships a different god. My studied opinion is: fuck em’ all. They want to hate and kill each other forever? Have at it. Only wish I could add, leave me out of it, but I’m American and the USA is all-in on Israel’s side, to my country’s shame.Arab terrorists attacked Israeli athletes at the Munich Olympics in 1972, killing eleven of them, plus a local cop. The movie starts there, but it’s less about Munich than Israel’s response, sending their own terrorists to hunt down and kill everyone allegedly involved in planning the Munich attack.Munich the movie is a grand thriller, slick and well-made, with its (fictional) hero written as a rookie, hesitant to be a terrorist, always trying to be sure he kills only the people deemed killworthy.You could enjoy this simply as an action movie, but it surprised me when Spielberg pulls his scenario back, and questions the morality of the vengeance missions. It’s certainly smarter than the Mossad’s motto, “Don’t fuck with the Jews.” Spielberg has set it up to get you rooting for Israel’s terrorists,
hoping they can kill all the Arabs who were behind the terrorists who
killed the athletes. And I couldn’t do it, sorry. Can’t cheer for
terrorists, even when they’re seeking vengeance over such
an outrage as the massacre in Munich. Also won’t shake pompoms for the
follow-up round of Arab terrorists who’ll be seeking vengeance for
Israel’s vengeance, and the rounds of terrorism to follow until the end
of time. There are no good guy terrorists, and vengeance is a dish best
not served.
The movie’s terrorists on both sides are motivated by righteous anger, and the script lets everyone have their say. You can feel for both sides, and walk away uncertain who’s right, which is as it should be, and as it is. It’s complicated.This might be Spielberg’s most nuanced movie, and he’s not the guy I would’ve expected this from. Dang fine moviemaking, and I’m flabbergasted that it’s nearly three hours, since it flew by like random bullets.Possibly it’s a problem with the print I pirated, or possibly it’s intentional, that about 2/3 of the movie’s non-English dialogue is translated and subtitled, but 1/3 isn’t?Verdict: BIG YES.

Top Secret (1984)

    10/2/2024   • • • Coming attractions • • •     Honky Tonk Freeway (1981)
Honour Among Thieves (1954)
The Hoodlum (1951)
Hooray for Love (1935)
    … plus occasional schlock, shorts,
             and surprises out of alphabetical order