our 61st weekly open mike
Let’s see what happens when your host (me) has nothing to say. Step right up, speak your mind, tell a story, sing a song, whatever.
1/3/2026
Anything goes — 1/3/26
23 responses to “Anything goes — 1/3/26”
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Well what the fuck man
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Exactly! That truly sums it up. Everything.
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I’ve been wondering what would happen with my orgasm life if I stopped smoking weed as an aphrodisiac, in conjunction with jerking it, and now I know. In my usual routine I have to plan it out, start the process at 6-6:30 so there’s a few hours for the weed to wear off in time for bedtime, pick a name out of the fantasy rotation, then smoke, grab the lube and have at it.
With this alternative method which I’ve done four times this month (actually a flashback to some years ago), I just pick up this photo of a naked girl I got off the internet and within a minute or so (same amount of time as with the weed) I’ve induced a substantial orgasm from my eager loins (for ye Olde Englishe fans), not as intensely pleasurable as the stoned model, but pretty damn screamable.
Now I’m wondering if throwing this “new” way into the mix right now is affecting my sleep somehow, I did just have the first night of insomnia in fifty-three days. I’m already up to six orgasms in December and could go for a couple more to set the record for a month this year, or take it easy buster, settle down now, maybe control the impulse some?
(The next week I got high, grabbed the lube and it didn’t work, and I wonder if I warped my fantasy life by jerking to photos this month? Shit, I bet, there’s always a price to pay, right?)
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Well, my first and most obvious question: Is my name in your fantasy rotation?
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Six successful masturbations in a month… is a record? You surprise me sometimes.
Marijuana & I have broken up, I think, but it never aphrodisiacked me. Usually the opposite. Made me hungry, then sleepy. Izzat unusual?
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My record for this year is 8 in January, even a couple years ago it was 11 now and then, so yeah, libido is falling…
I just tabulated all this year’s episodes and went 61 out of 80 attempts, about 75% success rate…
Melissa lead my fantasy rotation with 19 though I didn’t see your name there…
Melissa also had 8 failures which gives her a net of 11…
Seychelle produced eleven with only two fails for a net of nine…
Mimi came in third with ten and four fails…
I went to the photos because the rotation has gone stale or I have…
I imagine my numbers pale compared to the Hand Of Doug, so be it…
(Do you REALLY jerk it for an hour at a time some time, or always? Wow…)-
Stroking it is the *only* time I reliably finish what I’ve started. I don’t keep stats, but it’s been at least a year since I stopped without squirting, and it hasn’t happened a dozen times in my life.
Jerk it for an hour? Oh gosh no, that would be work. If I’ve mentioned “an hour” (or “hours”) that’s time spent scouring the internet for something worth my ordinary two minutes of effort.
Often I fall asleep while surfing but before touching. Which is fine. Getting to sleep is my primary motivation, either way.
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ah, okay, research, that makes sense…
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I wouldn’t have used the word ‘research’, but I love it and that’s exactly the word I’ll use in the future.
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I’ve constantly heard, well if you lose weight your libido returns. I’m like well that’s going to happen.
Maybe the GLP pill changes things and we’re all a bunch of fuckers again.What the fuck is seriously apt. I don’t fucking know where we are going anymore or if there are any safeguards at all.
There’s videos currently in Venzuela of armed men shooting folks who take to the streets. This is normal to supress popular opinion.It looks Like the geneneral poplulace of Venzeuala is happy that Maduro is gone. Great. Do it through Congress, otherwise it’s an illegal act. That’s what Trump does, He does the wrong things that has the most support.
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With a sustained diet and lots of patience, I lost enough blubber to hit the high end of my “chart weight.” I’ve gained most of it back, of course, but during my brief window of non-blubbertude I never noticed an increase in libido. There were lots of positives, certainly, but not that. So don’t get your hopes or erection too high. (:
As for Venezuela, I’m remembering Big Dick Cheney as the US invaded Iraq: “…my belief is we will, in fact, be greeted as liberators.” These things always go WTF, but no number of WTFs prevents the next WTF.
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While waiting for the New York subway to the party at WBAI on New Years Eve in 1974, where Wavy Gravy was MC-ing, and scribbling in my journal a young thug came up and said, “Are you writing about me? Don’t write about me.”
He put a razor knife to the front of my jacket and then sliced up my notebook. We changed trains and he came up to me again at the next station, fists raised. I raised mine and then just like out of a movie a policeman bounded down the stairs.
“I don’t want to be in court on New Years day,” he said. We boarded the train and when midnight struck the passengers left their seats with smiles on their faces, shook hands all around, and said, “Happy New Years!”
(Happy New Year Ya’ll, 2026)-
Were you writing about him? You did now, so I guess you’re the winner of that confrontation. More danger than I’ve ever felt riding public transit. Sounds seriously scary.
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hell no i wasn’t writing about him,
just some paranoid guy-
Or, a guy with the power to see into the future. He should’ve said, “Don’t be writing about me in 52 years!”
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Checking out now, bus in ten minutes. It’ll take two and a half hours each way, to get to the nursing home in Puyallup and visit a recovering friend. So don’t expect any posts until evening…
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okay, i’ll wait for a week of silence from you, before i send your obit to the AVA,
hahahaha?hey a cop just said nice things about my mini-comment in the ava today, oh shit,
now a COP is my Best Friend (don’t tell Sir Dougoid, the man who researches with one hand clapping…)-
If a cop said something nice about me, I’d think less of myself.
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I know, it’s always about you, but I may challenge you next time by
sending my most outrageous sex story (well, one of them, but really)
and asking you to not make it about you in any way…
that’s your formula, it’s all about you, okay, to be fair maybe it’s all about me,
all about everyone, but just this once I’d like to see a response not about you at all,
can you do it?
stay tuned, it’s wild, may chicken out…-
I’ve noticed that sometimes, more when I’m responding to something longer than just a quip. We’ll see if it can be done, but Me is my vantage point. Takes work to see from some other perspective, and I don’t usually put any work into my replies.
Hey, that was all about me, wasn’t it!
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Damn, finally doing something right, just read an article about diet and brain health and I regularly eat all the things recommended: berries, leafy greens, other vegetables, whole grains, beans, nuts, fish, poultry, and olive oil. (And not the detrimental stuff: red meat, butter and margarine, sweet treats, and fried foods, except cheese is on this no-go list and I do eat a lot of feta.)
Speaking of brain health, I keep my bird seed in a bucket on top of a little side table by the door and when I come in from a winter walk put my soaked boots on top and slide it in front of the heater. One evening last week I thought I’d pull the table back from the heater with one hand while brushing my teeth with the other, and to the floor spilled the five gallon bucket of bird seed…
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Gravity is such a bitch.
Do you feel any more brain healthy from eating a brain health diet?
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no, food is food, brain is brain…
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