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Endorsed by Louis Armstrong

It was more than an hour, less than two hours, but time stood still like my bowels. I sat there, grunting and grunting and getting nothing; then grunting some more, even prying at it with my fingers. I stood up and did deep-knee bends and touch-my-toes exercises to see if I could rattle anything loose. I danced a miserable Twist alone in the stall. Nada.

All this in a public men's room, at the hospital where my ailing wife had been admitted. I desperately wanted to be by her side, but instead she faced the doctors alone, while I struggled red-faced and exhausted with nothing to show for it, just grunting and grunting and grunting.

It was my worst constipation ever, and it was the day I knew that I was no longer a young man. When you're young, you just poop when you gotta poop. When you're not so young, a smooth and easy poop is something to cherish.

Ever since that day at the hospital, I've been taking Swiss Kriss laxatives, as endorsed by Louis Armstrong. You can't see it because you're not me, but at the Amazon link above, there's a memo at the top of my screen that says "Purchased 29 times." Yeah, I'm a loyal customer. Since I started taking these pills, the only time I've had constipation was when I forgot to take the pills.

Two tablets, once or twice daily. They smell and taste a little unpleasant, but so what? I asked my doctor, and he said he takes two pills too, every day. They're all natural, and not addictive or habit-forming, unless you want to be in the habit of pooping regularly.

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Active ingredient: Sennosides, 8.5 mg. Inactive ingredients: anise seed, calendula flower, caraway seed, hibiscus, peach leaves, peppermint oil, strawberry leaves), binding agents (calcium stearate, croscarmellose sodium, dicalcium phosphate, microcrystalline cellulose, polyvinylpyrrolidone, and silica).

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