THE NEVERENDING
FILM FESTIVAL
#162 [archive]
Emily the Criminal (2022) Emily has a criminal record, but it’s petty stuff —
a DWI, and an assault charge. She’s also swimming in student
loan debt, doing restaurant work, and wishing she was an artist.Emily won
me you over in the first scene, storming out of a job interview where
the suit asking questions wanted to ask too many, too nosy questions. She’s played by Aubrey Plaza, so she’d already won me over, long as she’s not endorsing milk.
She’s
looking for a way to make even a low-level living, but the movie is
filmed on location in America, where everything’s stacked against little
people. With her record and unwillingness to take crap, there aren’t a
lot of options, so Emily ends up taking a shady job,
doing work that’s shady and soon gets shadier. But it pays well. “You shouldn’t have been here. It’s your fault.”
Actually, you should be here.Unlike
everything else Plaza’s been in, this is
not a comedy, at all. It’s a thriller, film noir in color. It starts good,
gets better, and builds to a conclusion as tough as broken
glass. It even has something to say, without being preachy about it.Anyone remember To Live and Die in L.A.? That’s what this reminds me of — it has that grit, tension, and attention to detail, albeit with less glitz and flash.
Emily the Criminal is the first and so far only feature film by writer-director John Patton Ford. It’s dynamite, explodes in all the right places and ways, and Mr Ford is a name worth remembering.John Billingsley and Gina Gershon have small but memorable bits.
Verdict: BIG YES.♦ ♦ ♦ Miracles (1989)
a/k/a Mr Canton and Lady Rose
Jackie Chan
of the 1980s and ’90s was a favorite of mine, usually in double
features in San Francisco. Chan’s stunning DIY action sequences, light
comedy, and poorly-translated subtitles were a perfect mix.Well, here’s
an old Chan movie I’d never seen, and someone’s taken the time and
expense to dub it into English, even writing and dubbing lyrics for the musical
sequences, but… it’s simply not very good.At least, it’s not very good with these uncaring American actors voicing the lines. Chan’s ‘voice’ is so very not
his voice, and his voice is a big part of his appeal. Also, I miss the
poorly-translated subtitles.Verdict: MAYBE.♦ ♦ ♦ Nothing Lasts Forever (1984)”We shall show you that New York City is a dream created by higher beings as a temporary lodging place in the earthly sojourn.”
Zach Galligan plays
Adam, who dreams of being an
artist,
though he doesn’t know or care what kind of art he intends to pursue.This
is a 1980s film, filmed as if it’s a 1940s film — black-and-white,
kinda quaint set design, over-earnest performances.It’s
written and directed by Saturday Night Live‘s long-time short
filmmaker, Tom Schiller, and produced, of course, by Lorne Michaels, who
owns everything connected to SNL and dulls everything he does.You
might or might not remember the leading man, Galligan, as the dullest
part of Gremlins and Gremlins 2, and nothing much else. He’s always been
an empty space on the screen, and while this might be his best
performance ever, he’s still a blank.Nothing Lasts Forever is quirky and unique but often boring, with an unlikely but
beautiful theme of artists banding together to survive and help each
other.With its concept and a stellar cast of walk-ons — Dan
Aykroyd, Imogene Coca, Sam Jaffe, Bill Murray, Mort Sahl, and even
soapmaker “Dr” Emanuel Bronner as himself — one can only wonder what
this movie might’ve been like with a better actor in the lead, and maybe
without the involvement of Lorne Michaels. It would’ve been better,
certainly.MGM deemed the film so disastrous, it was never released, though (obviously) pirated copies are easy to
come by. Since the film leaked, hipsters have ecstatically
claimed it’s a masterpiece, but that’s a bit much.It’s a sporadically enjoyable bus ride to the moon with some weird,
whimsical moments, and it earns its happy, feel-good ending. Along
the way, though, everything stops so Eddie Fisher can sing “Oh My Papa,” and
there are numerous other baffling detours. Even when it’s telling its
story, what’s happening and why is of less than great interest.But the flick is
far out, which is short for “far out of the ordinary,” and that’s a good thing.Verdict: YES.♦ ♦ ♦ Coming attractions:Animal House (1978)The Arnelo Affair (1947)At the Circus (1939)
Bamboozled (2000)Beatriz at Dinner (2017)Brain Donors (1992)
Curse of the Black Widow (1977)Dark Days (2000)Edge of Fury (1978)Elysium (2013)Ghosts with Shit Jobs (2012)The Honeymoon Killers (1969)Invisible City (2009)Labyrint (1963)Our House (2006)Searching for Bobby Fischer (1993)The Thing from Another World (1951)Where the Wild Things Are (2009)7/12/2023 There
are so many good movies out there — old movies, odd or artsy, foreign
or forgotten movies, or do-it-yourself movies made just for the joy of
making them — that if you only watch whatever’s on Netflix or playing at
the twenty-plex, you’re missing out.To get beyond the ordinary, I recommend:Alter
Cineverse
Criterion
CultCinema Classics
DocsVille
Dust
Fandor
Films for Action
Hoopla
IHaveNoTV
IndieFlix
Internet Archive
Kanopy
KinoCult
Kino Lorber
Korean Classic Film
Christopher R Mihm
Mosfilm
Mubi
National Film Board of Canada
New Yorker Screening Room
Damon Packard
Mark Pirro
PizzaFlix
PopcornFlix
Public Domain Movies
RareFilmm
Scarecrow Video
Shudder
ThoughtMaybe
Timeless Classic Movies
VoleFlix
WatchDocumentaries
or your local library.Some people even access films through shady methods, though of course, that would be wrong.
Reviews are spoiler-free, or at least spoiler-warned. Click any image to enlarge. Arguments & recommendations are welcome, but no talking once the lights dim, and only real butter on the
popcorn, not that fake yellow stuff.





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