Bun Man

My second job was at a McDonald's near the main entrance to a huge and very busy factory. We had lunch rushes that were insane Mondays-Fridays.

You're supposed to have minimum three, maybe four people working in the grill area when things are crazy busy, grill, buns, dress, and fish & chicken. Our McD management "controlled costs" by having maximum three, sometimes only two people working the grill area during those hellish lunches.

By the third day of working short-staffed, one of the grill workers had had enough. He asked, do we have three people today, boss said no, and our hero — let's call him Bun Man — took his assigned place by the bun toasting machines. He did the best he could until it got real real busy, and then he started throwing buns at the shift manager.

Shift manager was a little guy, but Bun Man was tall and big and looked like he could kick your ass, and wanted to. He was hard to stop, in other words, so the volcano of buns continued. By the time the cops had handcuffed Bun Man and taken him away, there were hundreds of buns on the floor, and on the counters, in the fry vats, on the seats in the eating area, in the light fixtures, and all around the Ronald statue's feet.

That McDonald's didn't make much money at lunch that day, and Bun Man became unemployed, but he quit gloriously, don't you think? And the next day, four people were assigned to work in the grill area during lunch.

Bun Man became the stuff of legends. Even years later, you could go back to that McDonald's and ask any kid, even the newest hires, and they all knew all about Bun Man. To this very day, probably.



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